why bother
for the last 9 years ive been on off tormented by one person. something either needs to happen or not ever. i would really like to know which one cause im SICK of being lost everytime im let down. excuses or actual things happen? ive no idea. but im fucking sick of it. ive stayed up till 1am waiting on nothing. now ive only got 5 hours sleep before work. why do i do this to myself. and whats worst is refusing to cry. its so hard to not but then the second you do every other shit piece of emotion from every corner of your mind surfaces. im not a crier. ever. ugh. im so tempted to just send a text with “i give up” but what would that do to the best friend ive had since i was 11? its impossible to be just best friends with guys. im lost for an answer i’ll be happy with.
